I have been asked over the years why I do what I do; in regard to reading and writing theology. I’ve been asked if this is some sort of hobby for me (one time I was assertively told that that is all this ever could be). I am always taken aback by this question. I look at inhabiting Scripture as my life, not a vain thing. I look at good theology as an extension of, and deep dive into the inner-reality of Scripture; which is, Jesus Christ. I look at my Christian existence, and the doing of theology therein, as my lifelong discipleship project; as my sanctification; and this, wrapped in a doxological frame. But I didn’t arrive at this perspective without years of trial and tribulation. It has been those seasons of despair where the Lord has broken down all of the artificial and cultural structures funding my being, and rebuilding from there; on the foundation that only God alone can lay in Jesus Christ. And of course, these seasons ebb and flow continuously as the Christian’s life. I don’t view reading the Bible, reading theology, doing theology, practicing theology, as anything other than as an act of loving worship of my Father; indeed, of the triune life of my God.

I can sort of understand how that might look like a hobby to some. But at least for me, in the economy of God’s kingdom, I have no other categories through which to be in a constant growing and learning relationship with the living God. Indeed, I’m unsure how it is possible to really live the Christian life otherwise. It is false to reduce theology to a purely intellectual type of masturbation. This would indeed be some type of hobby of idolatry, wherein the person’s navel becomes something of their own holy of holies. God forbid that I would fall prey to ever viewing the engaging of theology as a hobby to massage the intellect with. For me, it is an Affective Theology that is at work, as that is grounded in the vicarious life of Christ whom I have come into the grace of adoption with. I have no categories for thinking the Christian life except through very intentional categories as those; indeed, as those are ever afresh anew apocalyptically inbreaking into my life as a Christian from this moment to the next by the mercy of the triune God.

My life, I always hope, is simply to be a witness to the ground of my life; who is the Christ. And in order for that to be an organically spiritual thing, it must be one that is deeply rooted in doing the work of rightly dividing the Word which is truth. For me, it has to be all or nothing. And even my all, apart from Christ, is never enough. But as Paul says: we aim for perfection. That is, we aim for the eschatological life of God to keep renewing us by both His death and life, as that is given expression through the mortal members of our bodies.

This is not a pietism. It is instead a devotion for Christ propelled by the very passion of His life for me, as my own. In other words, this approach of worship flips what is typically understood as a pietism on its head. It does this by understanding that the condition for living the Christian existence before God entails the concrete life of Christ as the ecstatic ground that it is, as He has come to us for us, and in turn, taken us with Him into the bosom of the Father. So, it isn’t a turn to the subject, and then only following, a reflexive turn to God. It is an immediate turn upward to God through the inner union Christians have come to have with Christ for them and in them by the Holy Spirit.